Hello, it’s Caroline Morris from Wide Eyed, sorry I can’t be with you live today but I am on my holidays. So, I thought I would record something in advance so that I could still share my thoughts with you. Today my leadership thoughts centre around conscious leadership. I am going to share some thoughts that I have about how as a leader we can be really conscious about how we turn up and our impact.
And my first one is about being mindful about what we say, and I had a great experience or example of this in the last week. I am used to being quite mindful and noticing what is going on. But this thing caught me, this particular phrase and I noticed how I then reacted and respond. And it’s the use of don’t and you have probably heard about this thing that the brain doesn’t cope very well with negative statements.
So, if we are told not to or don’t do something or don’t touch that, then we have to go through the whole thinking about what a touching it is before we can then go don’t do it. So, of course by then after we have gone through that whole thing about what it is to touch it we feel very compelled to do that.
M y experience was someone told me don’t panic, it was quite fascinating, at the time I was feeling quite relaxed about it, quite calm and then I thought gosh, am I panicking? What is it like to panic so I started to remember what it was like to panic and I got a little flutter in my chest probably and then thought “no I wasn’t panicking it was fine, I was definitely okay”. But then I thought should I have been panicking and then I started to over think about it. It was only a while afterwards, after I responded I actually reminded myself that I had fallen into that trap. I had responded to what somebody had said and then become that thing and started to panic.
I always say to leaders be very mindful of what you say so if you say to someone don’t worry about your job well then that’s what they will do they will go and worry about it. So, always think about the phrasing and what message you want to land with someone. So be mindful of what you say.
My second point is to notice your own triggers, so I have just described there I didn’t notice in time to stop myself going into that spiral of panic and so being able to notice where it is, where a feeling or a sense or maybe where you react. What we want to do really is get ourselves into a response mode, so we are being rational and being able to manage how we actually do respond rather than reacting. Notice what it is you do and then start to think about how you can respond differently.
And finally it’s about making conscious decisions, interestingly the most important thing we can do is actually make a decision and prevaricating and taking a long time to make a decision can cause a lot of challenges. Often a decision is better than a right decision. Although what I would implore you or encourage you to do is to think about that decision, maybe you initially had an instinct or gut feel or what people might call fast thinking, and then use that as an assumptions and test it. Don’t go over the top, don’t over analyse, don’t become paralysed by it but don’t just follow the gut reaction. Consciously make the decision and do make the decision, that’s a really key part of that.
Those are my thoughts for the day, be mindful of what you say, notice your own triggers and make conscious decisions. Please share your thoughts and your feedback on my thoughts. Finally I just like to say I have a download that helps leaders think about their compelling vision, so if you are interested in that it is also accessible on my Facebook site so please do go and download that. Anyway, bye for now and see you a week after next. Bye bye.